Meet Nikki: Fierce Warrior

I love this company and what you are doing for women by posting their stories! I think mine may inspire other women. 

I was married for 22 years with two children and suffered physical abuse for the first 5 years of my relationship. When the physical abuse stopped, the emotional, mental & verbal abuse continued. 

I had met my former husband when I was 18. Young, dumb and in love, I ignored all the warning signs. Fast forward twenty years and I found myself uneducated, jobless, no savings, two kids and I was a shell of the person I used to be. My ex had complete control over my words, my actions & my thoughts. I didn't know where he ended and I began. I was a puppet, a empty version of who he thought I should be. 

It's hard to explain to an outsider what that feels like. To not know which thoughts are your own or his. To feel totally dependent on another person you are sure you could never survive without them. 

I played my part. I portrayed the charade he wanted on display. But very few knew what went on behind closed doors. 

Once my children got older and the verbal abuse trickled down to them I knew I had to do something. Break the cycle. Make a change. Be the positive role model for them. Especially my daughter. 

After witnessing my being abused by her dad, one day my daughter turned to me and asked, "what the hell is wrong with you?! Why would you let him treat you like this?" And in that moment I made my decision. No more. It stops now. 

I ended my marriage. Left my beautiful home with my two kids and our dog in tow! No education. No job. No job experience or skills. No savings. Very little family support. But I did it. I stood up for myself. Got two jobs. Got an apartment. And showed my kids that when you no longer let fear control you, anything is possible. 

My divorce was a long, difficult journey. Leaving an abusive controlling man doesn't happen easily. And at the time I lost my uncle, grandmother, grandfather and best friend all within two months of each other. I thought I was never going to come out on the other side. Happiness seamed like a fairytale. Unobtainable. Not meant for me. 

But I stayed the course. I stayed focused. Strong. Determined. I wasn't going to allow him to take anymore from me. I wasn't going to loose myself anymore. I was finally taking control back. 

With the small amount of money I received from my divorce I took a chance and did something for myself and mine & my children's future. I bought a local business that a friend was selling (a tanning salon). I was scared, nervous & clueless but I didn't let it stop me! I knew I had what it took to make it work and what I didn't know I would learn along the way! 

Currently I run a successful business in my community. I help my daughter with her college education at her dream university. My son is thriving in school. And I finally met a man who showed me what true love really means. I have found happiness. But I achieved it when I decided to chose happiness above everything else.

I am a beautiful disaster because I have suffered, but survived. I am a warrior. I took my life back and proved to myself that I am strong and capable of anything! 

Thank you for reading my story ❤️

I probably should add I'm 42, a mother of a 20 year old daughter & 15 year old son 

-Nikki